Fear is a common topic in performance psychology, and I often ask groups I work with to identify the opposite of fear. Most people will say confidence or courage. These aren’t bad answers, but I believe the answer is love. Not romantic love, but instead I prefer Steven Pressfield’s explanation from a warrior ethos perspective. Most people have heard of the action-packed movie “300” centered on Spartans v. Persia in the Battle of Thermopylae. Fewer people realize the movie was based on the historical fiction novel, Gates of Fire, written by Pressfield. In this book, as well as in a shorter text, The Warrior Ethos, he describes fear and its counterpoise love. I can barely do justice to Pressfield’s writing, but I will provide my interpretations, and then provide a few specific examples in different performance domains.

The Spartan Shield

              The picture you see here is a depiction of a Spartan Shield. This item is crucial to the Spartan Warrior ethos. The Spartan warrior essentially has two primary physical tools in battle: the sword and the shield. During battle you will not want to lose either item, but the shield far outweighs the sword. The difference between the two is that you use the sword to defend yourself; you utilize the shield to defend your fellow Spartan warriors. If you have seen the movie 300, you see the Phalanx. Briefly, this is an ancient tight military formation where large shields are covering the warriors on every side. If a warrior loses a shield the formation is now susceptible to penetration; as such losing a shield is punishable by death. To be clear: lose your sword = that sucks, but we understand; lose your shield = don’t come back from battle, because you’ve dishonored your State and now must die.  Yikes!  Where’s the love?  Keep in mind we’re talking warrior ethos here, so stick with me as I put it together.

The Battle of Thermopylae

              “Gates of Fire” is about Spartans and their warrior culture. *Spoiler alert, the Spartans lose! Throughout the book, veteran leaders are teaching the young warriors how to confront fear. In the end the remaining Spartans, tired, beaten and knowing their fate, turn to their leader Dienekes for advice on how to stay mentally strong and courageous through such dim times. Dienekes says “Fight for this alone: the man who stands at your shoulder. He is everything, and everything is contained within him.” In this case the fear is the ultimate outcome, fear of death. Every warrior culture must have something to combat fear of death, and the winning answer is never hate. Pressfield’s story explains how love allows the mind to come to the present and brings focus. Note Dienekes is not talking about love of your country or even love for family back home. These thoughts also bring the mind to outcomes; fearful outcomes of what may happen given failure in battle. Read again: “He is everything, and everything is contained within him.” I interpret this to mean that you must fight for him, and he will fight for you. Accompanying love is trust. When teammates trust each other, they work harder toward common objectives. Working for each other rather than for the outcomes themselves – the outcomes which lead to fear. In this way love is the opposite of fear because it is the only emotion strong enough to combat fear.

Putting it into practice

              It’s a nice story but you might be wondering, how does the principles of hard Spartan Warriors Culture really apply to me? I’ve had a lot of success making this connection. I used the principles of this story as the backbone of my work with Army Men’s tennis during their 2011 Patriot League tournament win, their first championship in 5 years, and the start of a run yielding 4 championships in 7 years. Here’s how to use love to make a huge performance difference.

Example in sport: For me this is the easiest connection. A major principle of my work over the years has been developing Army officers through lessons in sport. Douglas MacArthur put it best when he said, “On the fields of friendly strife are sown the seeds that on other days, on other fields will bear the fruits of victory.” When working with Army tennis, after telling the story above, I had the team come up with their own Warrior Ethos: putting the focus on fighting for each other and trusting one another. The athlete-created behavioral statements related to this ethos were turned into a poster that remains at the entrance of their locker room today. Tennis players sometimes fail because they are afraid to let down their teammates (or sometimes coaches and parents). That’s not love. Love is knowing that as long as you fight as hard as you can that you will have support of your teammates regardless of the result. Teams that develop values such as trust and selflessness will have athletes more willing to compete in the present moment and worry less about fear of failure.   

Applied at work: Fear in the work place could relate to not closing a deal, not getting a pay raise, maybe even fear of being fired for underperforming. Love may not be the only answer to these fears, but it is a powerful start. First a reminder, we are not talking about romantic love here… that could lead to obvious problems in the work place! The crucial components of love in the work-place are trust and purpose. Paul Zak has been conducting some interesting neuropsychology research on the topic. Essentially when the “love” neurotransmitter oxytocin is invoked, work seems easier. Moreover, increased oxytocin in the brain makes us want to work together and increases empathy. I’m not suggesting “trust falls” here folks, but research is beginning to show organizational performance really does improve through exercises that promote togetherness. So plan a work breakfast, acknowledge when a co-worker does a good job, share information openly, shake hands, and definitely high five!  

Applied in personal life: The things we may fear at home can be complicated. Examples can include failing at parenting or as a partner, not making enough money to support the family, failing as a friend, inability to get everything done. For each of these if you have read above, one can begin to see the love connection. But here I want to discuss one of the most power fears that we often feel at home and in our personal life: The fear of success. For this I suggest yet another Pressfield book, The War of Art. When we give in to success, and the performance principles that allow it, we risk finding out how good we actually are. That is scary in itself. But something else often happens. As you succeed, you will find that others may want to put you down. They want to keep you in the role you have been operating in, and at a level of performance in-line with their own. These other people are full of fear. I believe love still is the force which defeats this fear, because you will find who your true comrades are: those who support your success. In order to succeed, you will learn to love yourself and as result be able to help and provide love to those filled with fear. So embrace the principles of high performance, rely and find comfort in your truest friends, and recognize you have become your authentic self.